Homestuck Get's Shreked
by MitchellHouse
Summary: This story is going to be in parts, if you like it or hate it, let me know and all make another.


**Homestuck  
get's  
Shreked  
by mitchell house  
****  
Chapter 1  
Ready or not.**

It was a beautiful day in shrek's swamp, the birds were singing the swamp was smelling rich as ever, and shrek was taking a massive shit just outside his home.

Shrek was very excited today, as his shit was turtling out of his ass, making sounds that very gods that made him would weep tears to.

Today, he was going to fucking throw that dumb bitch Fiona in the fire with all those little shit's he made with his orge seed, Donkey was also over today so why not kill two birds with one stone after all he was always so fucking annoying, good thing he always had plenty of rocks around so he could bash his head in with it.

But today, those thing's would not be anywhere as important his duty as are ogre lord, for today he would receive a package that was very important.

A loud boom sound came from outside and something hit the front of the stall scaring him making him jump as it would any of us, forcing his shit to be smeared all over his ass.

This did not please him he got very angry and he kick down the door sending it off its hinges and off onto the ground, his pants were still around his ankles and shit still smeared all over his ass.

His large cock flopping around free smacking horse flies as he look around for the poor soul that would dare challenge are ogre lord, then he saw the small package on the ground, it look small and had no writing on it, before he could inspect it in further detail. Fiona and the crib full retarded offspring ran outside and saw Shrek the way he did, and started laughing.

So he did was the right thing to do, he took off his pants and ran and grab Fiona by her stupid face then he used her to clean off his ass, he then snap her arm and said,

"Oh, what a shame don't worry all fix it, it will all be ogre soon."

Fiona started screaming and panicking loudly, he then drag her into the house and threw her in the fucking fire. Her body burn until she was nothing more than crisp corpse.

"Orges may have layers, but you were just the two a, ginger and a bitch."

He then grab the crib full the horrible mistake he made and decided it was their turn, throwing them in the cleansing fire that made everything better, he gave them his blessing and let them burn.

Donkey was in shock at what he just saw, and shrek turn to him and smiled and said,

"Their time was ogre, and your's is too."

Shrek then took donkey neck, snapping it completely and calmly went back outside pick up his pants and the package, he took his pants into the water to clean them off.

He then open the package and saw some stupid disc thing.  
he didn't know what this was so he thought hell all just shove this all up donkey's ass.

He finished cleaning his pants put them back on and went into his house he pick up donkey and spread open his ass, the walls spread far and wide this was good for he needed space.

He then shove the package slowly into his ass and then sat in his chair to relax.

Somehow by magic or science, or fucking miracles, donkey's eyes lit up like light bulbs a screen projected out of his eyes shrek was intrigued as he stared at the screen, he then saw all these kids doing weird and strange things.

These children were doing all of this and not worshiping their great and powerful ogre lord, this would not stand they would need be taught a lesson.

Shrek then pull down his pants and spread open his as wide as he could and shat out a onion, he then shoved this onion in donkeys mouth and then donkeys eyes lit up like a sun and open a gate to the kids universe.

This would be the first step in many for are great ogre lord, for there were many wrongs to write and many justices to be given this would not be a easy task but are great ogre lord would indeed succeed.

Chapter 2  
John do the windy thing.

John was busy being the stupid twat that he his  
going around making fucking windy noises, he was on his way to find his dad who for some reason doesn't have a real name besides dad.

Shrek had finally made his way through the portal and was in the battle field, off to find these kid's Shrek a face that seem like he was going to eat someone face, then smelt it the lingering smell of virgin booty john could not hide any longer as his ass would be grass.

Shrek was pleased by the smell, his pickle penis grew and grew from the smell of johns amazing ass and let loose a huge fucking fart that let him fly in the air after john.

John deiced he would talk to Karkat, Karkat was troll an annoying little twat that thought he was better than everyone or at least the ones around him, when he really just peace of shit that would have been better off fucking dead but don't worry he will be getting his reward soon.

John start talking talking to Karkat this is their conversion over their stupid chat client that isn't real.

John: "Hey karkat, how are you? I said a completely non homosexual way."

Karkat: JOHN YOU FUCKING FUCK DUMBY FUCK FUCK, 

**WHY DON'T SHUT THE FUCK UP AND HOP MY BLUGE FOR A LONG HARD NIGHT OF PANSEXUAL FUCKING.**

John: Ewww, way gross aren't we all like minor's even after a year or sweep passes were still pretty young, but everyone seems to think it's okay for kids to start dating and thinking fucking anyway so I guess I have give up my virgin ass because hussie thought romance and kids were smart idea, oh well guess it's not my choice to say other wise time to go my pansexual adventure.

Karkat: EXCELLENT I WILL WARM MY BULGE UNTIL YOU GET HERE, JONKAT OUT.

John stop talking to Johnkat, and decided to look for his fucking dad more, not like their were better fucking things for him to do nope he just wants to find his fucking dad.

When suddenly, a large green mass was flying at him he couldn't make out what it was, There was a faint sound of music it sounded like a really amazing it sounded like the greatest band ever smashmouth.

It was Shrek, and he had the largest cock john ever seen it scared him to the point he started to slowly started to piss himself which only made Shrek harder.

His cock was coated in his own sweat and sperm, the veins were so large they look like they were popping out John's first thought was to fly away, but are ogre lord knew better and jam his cock into Johns tight ass, it pierced through his godtier outfit straight into his virgin ass.

Johns ass expanded splitting open blood soon dripping out of his ass and onto Shreks cock, Shrek began thrusting in and out of his ass, gaining speed as they continue fucking.

John never felt so full, he felt as his life was melting away like Shrek cock was tearing him from inside out.

Shrek lean over to John and whisper in his ear and said.

"This is my swamp, and you're coming with me."

Shrek finally shot his load it was so massage it shot through john hole body and out of his mouth, John was now dead he would never get to feel Karkat bulge filling his ass, as now he was dead from Shrek massage cock.

Are great ogre lords first mission was complete, but there were still many disbelievers and he would make believe yet, shrek yet again open his ass and open up another portal and went through to find and fix this grave error.

Chapter 3  
Something very Shreky going on.  
Shrek made his way to land of light and rain and he didn't know what to make of it he honestly couldn't care for it, it had nothing on his beautiful swamp boy did he miss home it seem so nice they're now thinking about it, guess he will just have to hurry this up until then.

Meanwhile in completely different location someone is coming up with evil horrible plans.

Unknown person 1: So that's the plan, lure him into a trap?

Unknown person 2: Yes, their we can harness his power and take over the multiverse.

Unknown person 3: Hehehehehe, sounds like a plan. I like where this going, can we bound and gag him as well?

Unknown person 2: No, were keeping this completely professional, no fuck ups, no unnecessary retardation.  


**Unknown person 1&2: Right**

A door is open and footsteps of another person are heard walking in.  


**Unknown person 4: hey guy's I got the drinks.**

Unknown person 2: Really Mike? You pick all the times to hand us our drinks and you chose now of all the times.

The drinks are smack to the floor and hit ground making a loud sound.

Unknown person 2:Now go make them again. 

**Mike: Y-Yes sir…**

Will learn more about these people and this poor bastard later for now let's go back to shrek and see what he's doing.

Ah yes, Shrek was missing home, 

"**hmm? it appears there's a rift opening in the sky."**

Shrek found this strange as normal rifts can only be made by powerful beings such as himself, Shrek could sense a powerful evil  
behind the rift, he then said to whoever behind the rift.

"Show your self demon, before come up after you my self."

Then someone walk out of vail and it was revealed to be...Ronald Mcdonald!

Who else could it be, other than man himself the man who single handed mastermind, the murder **thousand**** of people at hands of shity tasting fast food, Not to mention he's ruin your image as the all power ogre lord.**

He latch on to the side of the open vail and began talking to him.

Shrek: Ah, so you've finally showed yourself Ronald.  
So are we finally going to do this your are you going to run with head between your ass again.

**Ronald: Hehehehe, as much I would enjoy with normal back and forth i'm afraid, i've been ordered not to get involved with outside of just talking, just know we have plans for you and this world, See ya later Shreky.**

He then disappeared into the vial without a trace, it seems like their much more going here than once thought it looks like you're going to need all the help you can get Shrek.

"It looks like things are getting very ogre."

**Before Shrek just leaves because there's nothing here he sees a computer is getting a message on it he goes over to examine it, seems someone was messaging whoever owns this. **

**Shrek: Hello?**

Kanaya: Oh Hello, You Must Be That Green Creature Thing.

Shrek: Am a ogre missy.

Kanaya: Right, Sorry, You Were The One That Raped John Yes?

Shrek: If you mean bless with my cock, then yes.

Kanaya: Right, Well I'm Talking To You From The Future Right Now And Well It Seems We could Both Use Each others Help?

Shrek: I'm listening.

Kanaya: How About We Help You Defeat Your Foes And You Help Us Beat Ours.

Shrek: Hmmmm, alright on one condition you all must see me as the ogre lord.

Kanaya: I Think That Can Be Met, So What Is Your Plan Great Ogre Lord?

Shrek: We have to find out ronald and his other friends are up to, and put a stop to it.

Kanaya: Okay Then Great Ogre Lord, Then This Is Our New Plan All Get Back To You When We Have More Intel On Them.

Shrek: Alright. am going to try and find out what this smell is am going to follow it till I get my answer.

Shrek, then let out a huge shit and flew at blazing speeds to find what this strange smell was, his shit shot out of his ass like fire hose going at moc 1, he was off to find out what this was.

**This the end of part one, if you loved or hated it let me know. and all make more.**


End file.
